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Safety First; Enjoy Your Ride.

Updated: Aug 28, 2020

And, as I shared the post & my thoughts on Facebook with my friends and family there -- here is what poured out of my soul:

Y’know. It’s real simple. You don’t like the rules in place to protect YOU and Cast / Team Members? (Or, insert anyone trying to give you an ounce of normalcy in this current chaos...) Stay. The. Fuck. Home.

How’s that for magical? 🤷🏼‍♀️✨🏰🎆🖕🏼

A few friends asked how I felt about the new rules rolling out at the theme parks — so, here’s my take:

Yes, it’s a lot. No, we don’t plan on going any time soon (although, to be fair, summer is not ‘theme park season’ for us locals. I sweat enough on my way to the car. 😂) And, if people want to go to the theme parks AND deem these rules to their liking/standards/whatever — then, they’ll go, and they should. If ANYONE can make this magical, it’s Disney & Universal. No it’s not ideal, but it’s where we’re at currently.

Also, I’m gonna say it — I hope after all this is over — MOST of these new procedures remain in place. Save for the masks & temp checks once it’s safe enough for us to go without. Theme parks are NOTORIOUS Petri dishes due to open mouth sneezers and those who haven’t learned how to keep their germs to themselves. Surprisingly, those are mostly adults who I can only imagine were out sick the day we learned about sneezing into our elbows or simply lack concern for other human beings health & well-being.

Either way, they should be publicly shamed and made to sanitize themselves at once. That’s a belief I held prior to COVID-19. I’m not against filling a water gun with hand sanitizer and squirting it at them from 6 ft away like it’s Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin. 🤷🏼‍♀️🤣

(As my friend Maggie commented -- can we please get the Monsters Inc. decontamination crew in the parks?) 😂

I applaud the theme parks for what they’re doing — these changes are HUGE, not what people thought they’d be (how many people said weeks ago “you’ll never see a Cast Member in a mask”...), and are what the parks and officials deem necessary to alleviate their risk AND YOURS.

They DO NOT want to be the epicenter of an outbreak — because, y’all. THAT would kill the magic more than your Donald Duck themed mask. And, likely, shut them down again — proving we cannot, ever, have nice things.

Listen, some of y’all NEED rules like you need Jesus — to keep you from doing some seriously stupid shit.

It is Florida, after all. But, I digress. 😂

It is like bag screening and metal detectors you now go through before entering certain areas to check for knives and guns and explosives — something that was implemented after 9/11 and the Pulse shooting — and also things people said would “never happen” at the theme parks.

It is like height restrictions and seat belts and lap bars on rides — something that’s existed on required rides for as long as I can remember.

And, honestly, people who want to be dickweeds about rules in place for SAFETY PURPOSES — deserve a lap bar accidentally slammed right on their lap for extra precaution.

Safety first, enjoy your ride. 😉👌🏼

*hops off soap box*

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