I just want to be married to him, because that’s the thing I always thought we were anyway – with or without the legality behind it. It has always been him.
No matter how others saw us or where they thought we were in life – we knew.
We were never afraid, there was never anxiety. We had a plan.
When the world assumed, “Well, that’s your next step…” I shook my head. We’re not playing by your rules, world.
When strangers would ask, “Why aren’t you married yet?” We made a case for paying off debts, being financially sound, and wanting to buy over rent.
You think getting married legally binds you to someone? Try purchasing three bedrooms and two and a half baths.
When eyes would widen and jaws would drop over my, “I don’t like diamonds…” they thought, clearly, I must be mistaken. “What woman doesn’t want a diamond?”
This. One. I think diamonds are boring. There. I said it.
The world acts as if there was some rule book we were meant to follow.
I’d tell you where to shove your rule book, by the way, but I doubt it’d fit…
Five years ago, I told him weeks into this — he’d never have to ask, my answer would always be, “Yes.” If we had gotten married on the spot…I’m sure the world would’ve had something to say about that then too.
The deepest part of me wishes we had…and told none of you until now.
When you get engaged, people gift you with advice.
Most of its fairly sound. Some of it’s complete crap.
A majority of it is along the lines of, “Make your wedding whatever you want.”
But, then. When you actually DO that thing. When you make it whatever YOU want – people have opinions.
And this is why people elope.
Because, fuck your opinions.
On days that end in Y … I think about how I don’t really care about the dress. There won’t be any flowers. We aren’t having a bridal party. We don’t want bachelorette/bachelor parties. I’m not tossing any flowers (because, see: no flowers) and spoiler alert – I won’t be wearing a garter.
AND NO WE STILL DON’T HAVE A DATE YET.
People have opinions on those things. They’ve voiced them.
As if they thought NOW we would start to do things the way the world wanted them done…
On days that end in Y…all I want to do is be married to him.
And that is the beginning and end of everything.